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Finding My Way Home
by Kirt Ejesiak

Which way to my spiritual home?

During the past few months I have found myself in a quandary. I have begun to question many things that I have strongly believed in: questions about what I want to do with my life, and about what it is to be truly at home. The reason? I am not sure why, but I know that it's something deep within my soul. This is what I hope to find out in my journey.

I am searching for what I call my spiritual home, looking for road signs that point the way in hopes of reaching my destination. There is a big difference, in my view, between where my physical home is and where my spiritual home may be. It's not necessarily in the same place - far from it.

Looking far into the Arctic distance, over the tundra, past the icecaps of far mountains, I have wondered if a sign might appear to lead me to the home I long for. A raven lands within a few metres of where I stand, and sends an important message that I cannot understand. Is it about my spiritual home? Have I been too long living this urban life - so long that I have lost the ancient ways of understanding the animals? That is not what I want. I want to understand, and I long to go home.

My journey has caused much pain for those close to me, and posed many questions for people who know me, as I seek out the place my heart yearns for. But it is a journey that I have had to take. My inner spirit has been calling for me to find the true home where I will find inner peace, tranquility and spiritual happiness. The things that a true home should provide.

I have searched the snow covered mountains, and the ice filled bays, asking my ancestors' spirits, "Where is this place my soul calls home?"

So, I have taken the first big step toward finding my true home - away from the familiar, away from those who love me the most, away from enemies who hope that that I will not find my way.

My bags are packed, my sled is ready. Now it is time to get the dogs and find my true home. Some questions do remain: Who will I meet along this journey? What will become of me if I am lost? Most importantly, will I finally get to my destination? It may take me back to where I started, but at least that's a journey that will have answered my question. Where is my home? Only the Great Spirit knows the answer.

Kirt Ejesiak is the creative director of Uqsiq Communications, providing new media services to Inuit communities throughout northern Canada. He also runs Inuit Sea Kayaking Adventures in Iqaluit, Nunavut, where he lives with his family.

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